Don’t get me wrong, I know many of you also use these huge axes to manage your body hair, but enough is enough. How about spears with heads the size of a flounder? What about flounders? Have you ever seen someone get hit with a two-handed flounder? Kitchen appliances? There’s a lot more creative ways to smite your enemies. You axe people are just lame. BORING!
Hammer smash good but no slice. Axe slice good but no stab. Sword stab good but no smash. Virgin barbarian picks breaky spear. Chad barbarian picks stabby sword for squishy baddies, smashy hammer for crunchy baddies, and slicey axe for grabby baddies.
U shuld lern up before Thog start laughing at u again.
Raw Pineapple on stick. smash slice stab
Call me old-fashioned, but I’ve always been a “beat 'em to death with their own torn-off limb” kinda guy. That’s how Dad did it, that’s how Granny did it, and hell, it’s a classic for a reason.
Greatswords have better damage dice anyway. :)
This is a good post, but I’m pretty sure most barbarians are illiterate. Not to underestimate them or anything, but i think this message will be best heard in a pop-up book.
Oh for crying out loud, that is such a Greek attitude. We barbarians are perfectly literate. Just because we don’t read or speak Greek specifically doesn’t mean we can’t read anything. Can you even read Amharic? I can, but to you it all sounds like “bar bar bar” whether I’m speaking Amharic, Egyptian, or Farsi.
You need to look beyond your own borders and realise that “literacy in Greek” ∈ “literacy”.
I’m more of a great sword kinda guy over an axe guy.
How about a M61A1 Vulcan 20mm rotary cannon?
