Worked security at a factory that made kitchen appliances. It wasn’t his first day, but it was his first shift by himself.

There’s a gate at the front that you lock when you go on rounds.

Dude chooses to go on a round 5 minutes before shift change for the factory workers. He gets a call on company cell that folks are at the gate. Instead of coming back, he tells them to wait 20 minutes so he can finish his round.

20 minutes where they won’t be getting paid.

Second in command big boss of the factory is out there checking IDs and directing traffic when dude gets back from his round. Now this dude is nice. Genuinely one of the nicest people you’ll ever meet. Old union rep, shirt off his back type. Tells guard not to worry about it, all’s good. Just time his rounds better next time.

Guard starts screaming at him about how he had no right to undo the lock, to get out of here, he’ll handle them, and if he wants to make them wait that’s his right. Boss man tells him to chill out, he won’t get in trouble, just go do his log and then he can take over checking IDs.

Guard pulls out, in one hand, a mag light flashlight he was told not to have, and in the other chemical spray that’s illegal for a guard to carry without certs (which he didn’t have), and this is an unarmed site. Threatens to ““arrest”” him. When boss pulls out his cell to call the guard company, the guard sprayed him and knocked his cell onto the ground, and kicked it across the parking lot, breaking it.

Needless to say, he was fired. Boss didn’t press assault charges, but we nearly lost the contract.

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I hired a woman once to work in the retail store I was managing at the time. After lunch, I noticed one of my long time employees crying in the break room. She had lost her wallet and whoever took it had wiped out her bank account at the Walmart next door. I called the manager over there and he pulled up the video and low and behold it was the new lady over there buying up gift cards. We called the police and after verifying what happened, they asked me if I wanted them to handle it quietly or to make a scene. I chose make a scene and they went into the backroom handcuffed her, told her why she was being arrested in front of everyone and marched her out. Needless to say HR agreed it should be an immediate termination.

One time someone showed up to work that was clearly different than the person from the interview. They never even got their badge.

I was a contacted technician at a retail store. They hired a new salesperson, immediately gave me weird vibes. On his lunch break, he came over to show me what I thought was going to be a meme on his phone - it was porn.

He was asked not to return for a second shift.

I have a couple from the a warehouse job I worked at when I was 16. That place was wild lmao

• Fired from unplugging security cameras to charge his phone
• 30yo man harassing a 17yo girl
• That man’s wife fighting the 17yo girl for “flirting” with her husband even though she wasn’t
• Got on top of some shelves and took a nap. These shelves are really tall and you need a lift to get on top of them

These weren’t on their first day, but I thought they are worth mentioning

• Racing during lunch in the parking lot
• 10+ person brawl in the parking lot over a guy stealing another guy’s girlfriend
• A guy left his keys in his car so another guy just broke the window. He said he thought it was funny and that he got the bit from a movie, tv, or comedian or something
• A couple people got caught taking lunch on top of the shelves in a corner because the lunchroom was too loud. They also had a bed up there made up bubble wrap and yoga mats
• Going full speed into a door with a forklift while the forks were fully lifted
• Doing BMX tricks off the truck dock. I think people were riding skateboards off it too but I can’t remember 100%

That’s all the entertaining ones I can think of right now lol

I worked at a tiny hospital in a rural area as the sole IT admin. They hired a new Director of Nursing, a very long process because we were so rural it was very difficult to convince people to move out there to work. They had helped her find and buy a house, helped her husband get a job in the area, enrolled their kids in the local school system. They had me buy a new computer specifically for her and asked me to come in early and be available to help with any computer problems on her first day.

She didn’t show up at all that day. People were pretty panicked about it. Next day she did show up, although about an hour late (not that anyone complained about it) and they rolled out the red carpet and everything. I spent most of the morning helping her get access to things and then she was off to more important things.

Next day she didn’t show up at all again.

That one orientation meeting was the only time I ever saw her, a few days later they asked me to terminate her accounts, preserve emails and pull security camera footage. I still don’t know what was going on. Drugs? If she had another job opportunity it seems pretty crazy to buy a house and move your whole family. She almost certainly would have been the highest paid employee, probably within the top 5 for the whole town.

But yeah, I guess if you don’t show up and don’t have a good excuse things end pretty quickly.

A couple times now at my current job they’ve hired someone, only to have them just not show up on their agreed first day with no communication. I’m guessing they just got a different job they like more or something, but still, I’d imagine one usually at least tells people not to expect you, under that circumstance?

I used to be a kitchen trainer at McDs in high school, one of my trainees got fired on her first day without me because she couldn’t remember what the different types of meat were. This was not only after spending my last 4 hours with her running through it repeatedly, but even directly after someone told her what they were she wouldn’t be able to point any of them out. I felt kinda bad because she was otherwise really nice, but it really was impossible to get her to retain any information.

First morning at the job he comes in wanting to impress, so he copies some company data to his personal laptop to do extra work at home. He got fired at noon. The official reason was that he had copied that stuff without authorization, but a more likely reason was that someone had accidentally written an extra zero on the offer they made him, because it was several times above average in the area.

One guy during the probation period called IT saying his laptop was broke, they told him to bring it into the office. It turned out he was on another continent and didn’t bother to tell anyone. As expected he lost his job.

Was a contractor for Walmart.

Got hired on as a lead dev, getting compensated 150k/yr.

2nd day, they told me I needed to switch contracts in order to stay on. New contract paid 50k salary… with lots of required OT.

But, it’s OK they said, you get benefits and PTO.

Fuck that.

Well, I passed out at a warehouse because my supervisor wouldn’t let me go for a water break in 100+ degree weather, and I got fired for “loafing.”

Does that count?

The forst job i had was advertised as a customer service role. My thinking was itd be taking calls in the customer service department. With it being my first ever job/interview I missed all the red flags, sales were mentioned berifly but i figured it wasnt the main part of the job so itd be fine, and they even asked me about being on a phone.

Cut to my forst day and im brought into a room with roughly a dozen other new people, we are split into teams, assigned a team leader and told tp follow that person to the train staion. Turns put it was a door to door sales job. I quit before we got to the train station.

Not on the first day but after a few weeks. He missed work every Wednesday, always claiming to have eaten something bad the evening before (it was always the same food). He wasn’t all that bright.