Mine would probably be Rabies.
There are a few prion diseases that are absolutely horrible. I believe one of them causes you to be unable to sleep until you go mad.
Thats called a job.
And I for a split second thought to myself we were in nsfw territory here lol
Work is often NSFW. That’s why OSHA exists.
Fatal Familial Insomnia
Mothetfuu that is scary
Edit: or the non hereditary version transmissible spongiform encephalopathy, TSE).
Fucking hell why did I read up about that. Okay this easily wins this post. Fuck that shit.
Literally my worst waking nightmare. Every now and then I have insomnia and 100% of the time I think, “Fuck…this is the beginning of the end…”
I remember reading that it gets so bad that, even after doctors put you into a coma, you’ll eventually resist that treatment and nothing at all will work.
Rabies. Where you become convinced that water is poison.
@Thavron yeah I came in to say Fatal Familial Insomnia but then I saw how painful some of the other stuff in here is and changed my mind.
Me: Prions. I know what they are, I know what they do. Terrible. I shouldn’t look up Fatal Familial Insomnia.
Also me: Yep. I should not have looked up Fatal Familial Insomnia.
@whaleross you just need to forget it before your next bout of insomnia.
You should listen to that book at bedtime. Surprisingly effective, and its not in the least boring
Alzheimer’s. The thing I fear most is that I will die surrounded by a bunch of people I don’t know, feeling scared and alone. I’m terrified of forgetting who my loved ones and my family are. I don’t want to go like that.
This is where physician assisted suicide has a really strong case.
This gets my vote. Runs in my family and I’ve seen it first hand a ton of times by now. It is absolutely heart wrenchingly terrible. Not looking forward to that one bit.
Yeah, my dad made a living will and made sure I was comfortable with making him die(right wording?) If he gets that way. Already have a state and legal process, just enjoying time why we have it.
Anything that makes you aware that you’re slowly losing touch with reality and control of your body or causes you to mistreat the people who love you.
This. Dementia and other progressive neuro conditions are fucking scary.
What’s more sad is that people won’t give those people a way out. I would rather go in a moment of peace and surrounded by family. Not wasting away and forgetting the world.
causes you to mistreat the people who love you
I’ve told my wife that she doesn’t have to spend time with me if I end up with dementia and I start behaving that way. Both of my parents were more or less all there well into their 90s, but you never know.
There are so many things that would be fighting for last place honestly. Idk, being stuck deep in a cave Nutty Putty style for days, barely able to breathe, arms pinned totally by my side, legs all twisted, total darkness. Slowly suffocating as the blood pools in my head and I become delirous.
That terrifies me so much. But idk, there are so many horrific ways to die. There are many cases of people being tortured to death over weeks or even months if they somehow survive that long.
There are also a bunch of diseases that are all around awful and terrifying. That syndrome where you are trapped inside your own body, total unable to move anything but you are aware of everything around you, maybe would be the most horrific.
Idk, too many horrible ways to suffer and die in this world…
Fuck, I forgot Nutty Putty cave. Switch my answer to that.
Every time I watch a video or read about that incident I feel myself start to almost panic. And I’m not prone to panic attacks or anything, but that scenario just makes me freak out.
Imagining the feeling of trying to move and feeling literal hundreds of feet of totally immovable rock encasing your limbs, not a milimeter of give or flex.
Ugg, literally making my heart rate go up as I type this :S
I think the cave that internet historian made video on was worse. The guy was stuck for multiple weeks.
I think I may be an outlier here. I really don’t want to die in a sudden ‘didn’t-see-it-coming’ kind of way, like getting hit by a semi or a freak accident with heavy machinery kind of way. The idea of going from living, thinking, feeling, person to chunk(s) of meat in an instant terrifies the shit out of me. Especially if it’s caught on video and people watch it for laughs or whatever possesses them to watch that kind of thing.
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to die in some slow, painful way either, but something I had some agency in would be worlds better. Like taking a bullet to save a loved one, or punching my own ticket after getting a terminal diagnosis, or even just taking a deliberate, calculated risk.
I’m alright with anything that will kill me instantly. My fear is having something so sudden that will keep me bedridden and helpless to finish it all. I won’t wish it on an enemy.
I had family members that needed care and I was happy to provide it. But to see them like that was hard and I know it was harder for them to go through that not just it felt like that to me but they told me so as well. They were too religious to end it. I’m not so I hope I’ll never experience this fear of mine.
Whatever’s finishing me off now is good enough. Maybe they’ll even bother figuring out what it was afterword.
Fingers crossed I land on my head during one of the falls or my heart just glitches out like the rest of me. Maybe a good spasm on the way to work and I can just become a flaming pile of car wreck.
Be a lot better than suffocating during one of the breathing issues or just being stuck in one of the headache/fog days.
Edit for anyone that read the rest:
Well, I woke up this morning, oh well.
Looks like today is right shoulder and left tricep doing a tap dance while right calf muscle and foot attempt a ballerina toe stand. A little elf has grabbed the back of both eyeballs and is pulling on them like an overstretched rubber band. Needed a shower and new clothes at 4:30a.m. because I thought I could use a sip of juice to clear my throat. Both hands feel like they’re stuffed in a tub of Play-Doh.
Looks like it’ll be a good day because that’s pretty minor. Got the fireplace going and the warmth is just soaking in like heaven. 🥴
Are you having seizures?
Yes, no, sort of, er, let’s just go down the list. Warning, this is probably morbid and disturbing.
At any random point either leg might just say, “nah I don’t feel like it” and down I go.
Or maybe it feels like it but only a little so it won’t move all the way or I’m limping.
Maybe today I can reach behind my back, or maybe I’m going to feel like I’m tearing an arm off just to finish using the bathroom.
Maybe I can stand up straight, or reach for something, maybe not.
Maybe if I try to lay comfortably I won’t end up with limbs that won’t quite settle all the way because the muscles don’t want to relax.
Any muscle anywhere can decide it wants to start doing it’s own little Morse code impersonation, including ones controlling things like vision, ear pressure, or random areas you don’t really consciously control.
Maybe I can see clearly, maybe it’s double vision, maybe one eye won’t follow the other eye, maybe it’s severe tunnel vision.
Maybe I can take a full breath, maybe the muscles over my ribs decided they want to cramp up if I take more than a small one.
Maybe I can hold onto something, and my hand will decide wether it wants to randomly open or just close itself up and have to be pried back open.
Maybe I feel mostly normal, or maybe someone is beating my head and multiple other areas with crowbars and ice picks while I go about my day.
Maybe I can eat something right now, or maybe one mini pretzel will trigger several hours of severe cramping and diarrhea.
Maybe when I blink an eyelid will get stuck in the down position.
Maybe I’ll yawn and my tongue and jaw muscles will all cramp and lock.
Maybe an eye will have a muscle cramp that feels like a fish hook tearing the eye out of your skull while the eye points in a random direction.
Maybe when something touches my skin I’ll feel like it’s still there for minutes.
Maybe I know which way is up but mostly likely I don’t have a clue.
Maybe a bit too much ambient noise starts causing severe headaches trying to sort out the stuff I need to hear.
Maybe I can talk well or maybe I take it easy and use small words that don’t require much vocal, uh, dexterity?
Maybe I heard what you said but there’s a 5-10 second delay before I actually know what the words mean.
Maybe I’ve forgotten how clocks work for a few seconds.
But mostly I work and move about slowly while random things twitch, glitch, ache, cramp, sting, stab…
And meanwhile I smile and look happy and give the kids a good day and lots of places to go so I can just sit for a bit and do some breathing and positive meditation until everyone’s tucked into bed for the night.
Then I can relax on the recliner with a good strong drink and cry about whatever hurt today while I think about how nice not waking up tomorrow would be and worry about the kids needing me.
Then I get up the next day and do it all over again.
Dang that sounds rough to deal with. I feel that way sometimes about the kids needing me and finding it hard to keep going, and that’s with just your typical middle age aches and hormone stuff. This is like next level body betrayal.
Omg. I’m so sorry… Muscular dystrophy, maybe? Or some weird variation of Parkinsons?
Spent 6 months arranging visits and tests with every type of specialist available for anything I had issues with.
They said the individual parts appear to be working fine. No genetic, auto immune, blood or other disorders could be found.
Neurologist decided their isn’t anything to look for because I’ve had an MRI before and it was clean/clear.
Only guess is a severe childhood head injury, 12+ foot fall onto concrete. The recent MRI said I chipped some neck vertebrate so long ago the bone fragments were gone. Might explain the severe childhood migraines too.
Dying at work.
These people have already taken damn near everything they can from me. I’d rather kill myself right now than find out I die at work.
Well if we exclude the slow and painful ways to die I’d say that drowning by diving under ice and not finding the way back. The panic on your last minutes must be something else.
Where the F are serious mental health conditions? When your appearance seems intact from the outside, but inside your reality slowly yet steadily derodes, and there’s no way to help it. Going insane. That’s for me the last one. Prefer physical pain over losing touch with reality.
My biggest fear, given mental health issues, wondering through out life if I’m going insane, seeing things, hallucinating, etc…
I’m terrified that the moment of death, I won’t be able to tell if it’s real or not. So it will be an infinitely protracted moment, and right now, I may already be in that moment.
Idk, but bone cancer looks like a bad way to go.
My mom died from that one. Horrible. Morphine couldn’t touch the pain
I’m sorry to hear that. Wouldn’t wish it on anyone.
For me, it’s any situation where you know you’re fucked but can’t do anything to stop the inevitable.
Give me instantaneous death where idk what happened or a slow progression of disease where death would eventually be a welcome relief. It’s the in between that freaks me out.
There’s a horror movie called The Sacrament and in it one of the characters while totally conscious is injected with a slow acting poison against their will and had no options to counteract it or whatever. I don’t get freaked by much but that really fucked with me. Knowing that you had 30 minutes left and there was nothing that could be done is horrifying
I mean, doesn’t just “living” fit that definition?
Lathe accident.
I’ve seen a video and heard some stories. I work in a CNC shop, but I’m not a machinist. I think it would be terrifying for a moment, painful for a moment, then nothing. Gruesome for sure, but I think they’re are certainly worse ways to go. I believe the ‘popular’ video is called, pink mist, or something like that, if that’s any indication of the outcome.
Ugh. This is why I’ve stopped clicking on everything.
Being eaten alive by animals
Especially if already injuresd or weak such that you can’t fight back and it’s just a few smaller animals. You can feel every little bite, rip and agonizing tear and your death is greatly prolonged.
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Nightmare fuel
Some kind of dementia. It’s a cancer of the soul which arbitrarily removes parts of you that you can’t even perceive the loss of. I had an MS patient whose vocal processing was reduced to the point that he could only say variations of “you fucking bitch”. He was totally bed-bound and dependent on a mostly female nursing staff for every single need. Most of those employees were burned out and he could only communicate to them using a wildly misogynistic slur. I’ve seen it reduce a famous AIDS researcher and a WW2 pilot to toddlers, others to cornered raccoons, for some it’s a nightmare they can never wake up from and they just spend all day/night reliving their worst memories. For a good 10% on the ward it just takes away their executive function and they can no longer control their worst impulses or recognise that they should.
Cancer and strokes are a close second for more or less the same reason, but dementia is so existentially terrifying to me.
